So, what have you learned form the world of Oblivion? Here are a few things I have:

- Every man, no matter how old, has washboard abs.
- There are only a few possible voices everyone on the planet has.
- The fine for necrophilia in Cyrodiil is nothing compared to the one in Morrowind.
- Cats and lizards can walk on two legs, and talk.
- No one ever uses the bathroom anymore.
- You can bribe anyone, including Counts, who already have an abundance of gold, into liking you.
- If you sleep in jail, you shall awaken outside it. But still donning your prison-wear.

Edit: If you wish to make an addition, please go through the thread first, as you might just be repeating something. You're gonna go through the whole thing after you post anyway, might as-well do it first.

If I kill someone and fall asleep, a scary man in black robes will appear next to the bed
Orcs, are not infact, from middle earth.

Hammering a leather jacket will, in fact, improve it's condition.
The better locked something is, generally the less valuable the items in it are.
Getting impaled by arrows is a minor inconvenience at worst.
Every living creature wants to tear you a new one. Except in towns.

If things don't go to your liking, no worries - just reload a save!

Had me laughing hard! So true.

Inspired by a chest with very hard lock, containing only 8 gold :swear:

Yes. But the best spent 8 gold of all time. Those two bottles of "Ale" were priceless.

That even though no-one saw you kill someone and you have no bounty, the guards still know that you are "a murdering bastard" and it′s best for you to have your weapon sheathed or they will put you down themselves B)

I guess they take a peek at your status sheet....

If you hear someone say "by azura by azura by azura!" run like hell.
Cliff racers fly high.. so high.
Picking up a tan cup may result in a slaughtered town.

Related to that, shopkeepers KNOW what items you have stolen, but see no reason to inform the guards about them. Of course the guards know too as they confiscate them if you get arrested, yet possessing stolen items is not a reason enough to get arrested.

I guess guards and shopkeepers see the red hand icon too...

...If I ever get thrown into jail, I shouldn't fret because there's always a possibility an Emperor who sounds like Patrick Stewart will show up with his posse and let me escape thru a door that's been hidden right there the entire time!. :wink_smile:

I've learned a lot from Oblivion:

Jauffre will implicitly trust anyone (even an escaped prisoner) if they give him a big red amulet and tell him a tall tale.

Never eat anything offered to you by Weebam-Na. It might contain powdered deer...Well, just don't eat it.

Mehrunes Dagon is extremely stupid. He knows the only way to stop the Draginfires from being re-lit is to kill the last of the Septims. But, he is too stupid to think of opening an Oblivion Gate at the main door (and only way in or out) of Cloud Ruler Temple. He strike at Bruma instead.

A Will-O-The-Wisp is not a "pretty light". Stay away from it.

Never trust Ma'iq the Liar. He's called that for a reason.

Jumping off Dive Rock is painful (but still fun, if you survive).

You are the only being in existence that everyone & everything knows to fear. This is why Conjurers summon more & more powerful creatures against you as you gain in power. It's also why Necromancer animate more powerful undead, Mages use stronger & stronger spells, Bandits & Marauders upgrade their armor & weapons, and more & more powerful Daedra come to challenge you.

Crazy people can be fun to watch.

Blond Bosmers can be annoying. They can also give good back rubs. They also commit suicide if you tell them to "beat it" at Dive Rock.

You know Umbacano? That eccentric Altmer collector who pays you tons of gold to find ten Ayleid statues? He's not your friend.

If you don't like fighting big, scary monsters, don't go near any big arches with a glowing red field of energy in them.

Falling in lava is not immediately fatal, although it will kill you pretty darn quick.

Always let a battlemage lead the way in an Ayleid Ruin.

Rumors are created by a scary man named Lucien LaChance.

The Count of Skingrad enjoys the night life.

If someone sells you a house really cheap, it's probably haunted.

If you have to travel, stay on the roads.

Bugak got a book store.

Never touch anything you don't own, you'll get arrested.

It's okay if you knock somebody unconscious. You won't get in trouble, no matter how many people are around. As long as it takes 1 hit.

Never take an apple from a person in black robes, no matter how shiny and sweet-looking.

Mountain lions can turn invisible, watch yourself out there.

:lol: Yea...by the 'Nine Divines', stay on the roads! lol



I've also learned I'll be able to see all my co-workers thru walls....all I'll need is a mortar & pestle and some basic ingredients.


EDIT: Just got back from Wal-Mart. Asked the guy if they sell mortar & pestles and he gave me a blank stare, so I bought an electric blender instead.

Those liars!! After mixing up an orange, a loaf of bread, and a dead rat in the blender, and then drinking it at work, I still couldn't see my co-workers thru their cubicle walls! :rolleyes::lol: Got real sick though.

Dead rats don't taste very good, especially when mixed with oranges and Wonder Bread. :facepalm:

-Taking on a mountain lion on normal difficulty with a dagger and a very bad Blade skill is not a good idea.

-Taking on a mountain lion on normal difficulty in a hand to hand fight wearing no form of clothing is a very bad idea.

Wonder Bread? :shakehead: No wonder the potion didn't work. Wonder Bread isn't made with Cyrodilic dough. Here's a few Cyrodilic tips for your future culinary endeavors:

Carrots can enable you to see in the dark.

Cheese can protect you from fire.

Garlic can protect you from cold.

Ham can make you unlucky (guess that's why it's not kosher)

Lettuce can make you lucky. :hubbahubba:

Potatoes can protect you from harm.

Strawberries can cure poison.

Venison can make your burden lighter.

All the horses of Tamriel are actually mountain goats cursed by the last of the Ayleids with a permanent illusion spell. Unfortunately, the hors...errr goats didn't seem to mind that much, infuriating the last of the proud Ayleid race to no end.

It's possible to carry dozens of swords at the same time, without a backpack.

It's also possible to run (and swim!) at full steam for miles while wearing a full plate armor suit. Yea.




*smacks head* Always a catch to everyghin...

It's possible to get mugged by guards while out in the wilderness.

It's also possible to walk on water with all that stuff. And, even though it's fairly easy to do that, it's not so easy to drag a dead body any significant distance (like across the room) even if you're not carrying anything else.

Speaking of dead bodies, yet another thing I've learned from Oblivion is that it's possible for a dead body to stand up straight all the sudden for no reason. It doesn't seem to happen often, though.

Real life has a nice processor and video card.

Lies! Mine still stutters at 10fps!!

Things I learned from Oblivion:

• Cyodiil looks a hell of a lot like Washington.
  
• Dreams CAN kill you.
  
• Tamriel's entire abundance of marine wildlife consists of one fish... with lots of teeth.

Wow I never noticed the fish thing. I'm pretty sure there was a regular and a "king" or "giant" version of that fish (whose name escapes me at the moment).

Another thing I learned from Oblivion:

If people can't see you, you aren't there, even if you knock things over and smack them around. Well, except guards. Guards have this psychic ability to find you even when there is no humane possible way for them to have done so.

If something is missing, check the bushes (or if you have them, barrels) outside your house for them.