I've always wondered what these people did with that sweetroll, so what would you do if thugs jumped you in an alley when you were carrying your sweetroll?

Just 'cause, here's mine.

So I took the sweetroll and... I put in on the ground and we all started to dance and chant around it, how I love my sweetroll cult.

My small fist spiked the air. From the resultant orange cloud of magicka emerged Spike, while my own form simultaneously vanished into the air. My old friend shook his long nose and heavily armored head, while flicking his reptilian tail. A maw full of daggers opened wide to shriek in challenge. My sweet roll was safe, for Spike prefers to eat thugs.

Heavy.

The Sweetroll bit is a homage to Morrowind's character generation questions.
Personally I would hand it over, but have it secretly poisoned beforehand, because it's fun to watch people die helplessly. (LOL at Roderick)