Well, whatever I'm in for, I sure as hell hope it's not because I accidentally touched a fork. :dry:

They're all the same, just because a Dunmer was sighted murdering two Argonian diplomats and I happened to wear a shirt saying "Argonian diplomats svck" while carrying a bloody sword they just assume I'm responsible...

I was accused of murder through it never happened but I may have annoyed some people when I went urinating on everything that moved...not the proudest moment in his/mine life

My Dunmer Ordinator/Temple Mage: Killing an Argonian within the first week of living in Skyrim (well, they started it)

My Nord Hand-to-Hand, Dragon-Punching Walking Tank: Stealing spoons from nobles (what? he likes spoons)

the reason i was in wasn't important... but i was shocked to find out snooki was the dragonborn before me

Korgoth of Barbaria is sent into jail solely because he looks like he is killing people even when he is cleaning his nasal areas.
That, and people complained that loud and unpleasant music begins to play whenever he walks into town.

Why are you in jail?......

Duck six... 'Nuff said.

Several, SEVERAL, counts of public intoxication and indecency.

Writing a controversial novel about "The Lusty Dragon."

skooma... it's a hell of a drug.

Got too friendly with an Imperial captain's daughter.

My character was in jail because he was an alien from a planet called Earth. He talks about how his people worship this diety named Jesus on his planet, and the inhabitants of Nirn thought he was mad. They took this 'Jesus' concept up with the elder council, and they proclaimed that Jesus was Daedric. To supress more religious confusion along side of the Elder Scrolls Profecies, Catholicism was shunned, and never announed to the public. The human prophet (me) was thrown in jail so he could not spread the word. He then spent 2 years rotting in a cell with divine information, but only to realize he is DRAGONBORN!

Because I am a BADASS!

lmao

i was caught holding a spear

I commissioned some pirates to bring in shipments of Skooma twice a month. An Imperial agent, posing as an undercover deckhand on the pirate ship, set up an ambush as soon as the delivery was made.

Plus, my lawyer screwed me.

Pick up zero value fork, guard gets you >_>

Stop right there criminal scum!

Im an orc... I was hungry... There were horses...

I had relations with the head imperial gaurd's sister.

Wrong place, wrong time, and the wrong woman. You know how it goes.

I'm in jail for tavern fighting.

I'm in jail because I woke up in a smoldering crater and killed 68 guards with a katana in each hand before I surrendered to the remaining guard with a smirk on my face. As he drags me off I smirk my Tsaesci-Smile and tell him that I will consume each and every aspect of his mythopoeic essence.

Ye shall wish for Alduin.

I was silent fellow who kept to myself mostly. Actually was rather nice to anyone willing to risk talking to me. Sadly a rumor started going around, this being common in small towns, that I was a vampire (whether thats true or not we will see in Skyrim :hubbahubba: ). Speaking as I usually spent my nights drinking in a dark corner of the local tavern, the guards didn't have much trouble finding me.

As they walked in I glanced over but continued reading my book. Then I noticed them walking towards me. The fat head guardsmen then preceded to tell me I was under arrest for conspiracy and vampirism. As I tightened my muscles to reach for my bow, I looked around the room and noticed the many townsfolk glaring. I took a calming breath and asked exactly why I was be accused of this. One guard then suddenly reached for me, and in one quick instant he was blown back from a fireball out of my palm. The others took a step back, in perfect unison with the gasp of the townsfolk.

I then realized that whatever resistance I put up wouldn't help my case. I was desperate for money and couldn't afford supplies for an escape south, especially an escape through the wild this close to winter. So with that in mind I stood up and handed my bow to the Inkeeper, every eye in the tavern moving with me.

"I'll be back for that real soon."

8 years and one shaggy beard later..........

Got piss drunk and woke up here... :foodndrink:

My only crime is breaking someone's heart.

Because I illegally downloaded skyrim at release? lol