Hello maggots. this is Mehrunes Dagon in disguise. Fear me. Boo.
I can stomp on you.

Warg gro-Lok approves of this thread. Smash magic!!!

From the desk of Sir Rugrat gro-Shurgak, son of Lord Rugdumph and Knight of the White Stallion:

Such ineffectual discord should be imploded. Stipulating agreements all around! All of you are worthy of admonition! I hold special disregard for the comments made by the Mages Guild Wizard, Michael. In you sir, I sense a kindled spirit. We are both culpable of being dilettantes with our comments! It takes a special kind of forebodance to see both sides of an agreement.

Halken’s comments arise me to the fact that our discord has gained the attenuation of base brigades and associates. You must be lacking in pallor to strike with such impiety from the shadows! Your odorous ways can be counterfeited by light spells from the mundane classes. All a warrior would acquire is a torch.

I am most beholding to Savlian for the attenuation given to my families hairloom. That reticular sword was beneathed to http://www.uesp.net/wiki/Oblivion:Maglir for services reneged. I have been deformed of the fact that he may have lost it fleeing from vial monsters in http://www.uesp.net/wiki/Oblivion:Robber%27s_Glen_Cave. I am concurrently planning an explanation to reprieve it.

Finally, to the estimated Gorbad Ironclaw, I would sinfully ask: Please sir, revile me with an instant in which a father killing his prodigy is the proprietary action to take! Kinsman-killing is a crime where I come from! I can appreciate the veal that you show in you agreement, but I cannot undress your reclusions.

-R

Shrek anyone?

If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight!
The Champion of Cyrodiil said that, and I think he knows a little more of fighting then YOU do pal because he invented it!
Then he perfected it so no living man could best him in the ring of honor!
Then he used his fight money to buy two of every creature in Tamriel. Then he put them in the Arena and BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF EVERY SINGLE ONE!

Now anytime there's a bunch of animals in one place, it's called a zoo!
UNLESS IT'S A FARM!

I started as a weakling Breton but I found that the natural resistance my race has developed to be an indicator of the future for such mystical arts. With a couple pieces of gear I am near invulnerable to such pathetic light shows that my brothers call "destructive" forces. With the instrument of humility in hand, a daedric maul enchanted with the ability to reduce my target's personality, I give such "intellectuals" a hard-knock lesson on the nature of an "ugly stick". Perhaps I should visit the Mage's Guild hall and deliver an education to their aspiring apprentices. Oh, such fun I will I have chasing them around!



As a side-note, I can run backward faster than a clannfear can charging at my face.... perhaps the physical atrophy cause by spending too much time spent indoors polishing their "staff" has resulted in ignorance about the benefits of a an active lifestyle.

Mages make Fire. Fire bad. Fire Bad!!


I fought a mage once. I shot him in the head with a poisoned arrow. He wasn't wearing a helmet. Mages are dumb. Now, I'm not one for anti-intellectualism, but you're a dude in a dress throwing glitter everywhere. Unless you're going to start singing or insulting people you've got no business with that.

I run from the big, slow, stupid orcs. I run from the shiny fireball. I run naked through the woods and live off twigs and berries. When danger approaches I jump into the water, where the fishes are my friends. I wait for you to drown and then I take your fancy trinkets and sell them to the woman with the glue voice. Then I take off my clothes again and wallow in a steaming tub of nirnroot. It does so open the pores.

Are you by any chance related to uhmmmmmm........... Glarthir?

Just as I thought, juust as i thouught!!!

Who do you think told him about the spies everywhere?

Dear Gaerolth,

Silly Orc. Don't you know that potions are magical?

As a master of Alchemy and a professional Herbalist and Alchemist, I can assure you that you have been using magic all along.

For more information about magic, please come and visit me in Anvil. You will find me breakfasting with the mages at the guild hall on mornings when I am in town, We can talk about magic and you can try my famous Apple-Berry juice made exclusively from apples and blackberries.

Angel, Conjurer, Mages Guild
Benirus Manor, Anvil

Potions are not magic!


The Mages Guild is conspiring to control the production and trade of potions to support their addiction to evening gowns. Perhaps they should start calling tailoring a magical profession instead?

Bereg Arkngthand, Dwermer Battlemage responds:

Any fool can mindlessly bludgeon their foes to death, and Indeed I find it refreshing to do so on occasion. However it hardly compares to turning your enemies into smoking piles of ash, or watching them scream in agony as your spell splinters all the bones in their body. And the satisfaction you get from sapping away your enemies ability to fight? Marvelous. Simply Marvelous. And you can't forget the practical applications as well. Why expend all that energy to break down a door, or tear a gate from it's mounts when a simple spell will make the lock fail? Or the look on a bandit's face when they think they have you cornered and alone, only to find a Dremora breathing down their neck? Priceless. Of course those who wish to cripple themselves with one or the other, by all means, enjoy it. I'll happily clean up the remains after a marauder battlemage spreads your carcass across the hill like Ash Yam Jam over Bread.

Never listen to anyone who gets weaker when he puts on an iron hat.

The only difference between pure warrior and pure mage is that the warriors can bear much more hits before falling, while the monsters see the same thing to themselves when facing a warrior.

From the Chicken Scratchings of Gork, Grandmaster Pitchfork Hurler Three Years Running

Why magishuns use big wurds?

Big wurds no block flying pitchforks that go SHENK into tummies.

Indeed, when Buffy looks at Mazoga or Agronak gro-Malog, she feels quite inadequate. She hears the Fighters Guild commended 'if you have the stones for it'. Alas, she has no stones at all. The tiny wood elf is condemned to looking up at almost every NPC in the game, being teased about being a twig, and unable to ever raise her strength or endurance.

She hasn't the strength to lift a war hammer, and barely enough to irritate someone if she tried to use a dagger. It is no wonder then, that she turned to magic to augment her bow. It is only with magic that she can survive.

For those powerful souls who have the strength, endurance and stones to hit hard and wear proper armor, she simply envies you. Just remember, not everyone is built for that.

Buffy may have the butt of a butterfly, but thanks to her bow and magic, she can strike like a dragon and roam Cyrodill freely. :dance:

Paxelle steps onto the soapbox and clears her throat...

"I think you're all a bunch of oafs and daedroths. I have successfully won my entry to the Arcane University, secured my staff, and closed a number of Oblivion Gates, without ever killing any person or creature.

"Those of you with pots and pans on your heads, wandering around with pointy sticks, can probably be excused, because you obviously don't know any better. But you mages should be ashamed of yourselves. With a simple wave of your hand, you ought to be able to walk past any guard, with no need to do violence.

"Didn't your mothers teach you better than this?"


:wink_smile:

From the desk of Sir Rugrat gro-Shurgak, son of Lord Rugdumph, and Knight of the White Stallion:

Clearly there is a place in this world for the yielder of weapons and the abuser of magic. We all tend to regurgitate toward the weapon which most suits us. The unanimous Orc who started this condensation is indisposed to the abuse of weapons. Our estimated Buffy infatuates the minds of her adversities with her Illusion magic, even as she percolates them with her bow. Arkngthand (my heartfelt condescension to you for the dissipation of the rest of your clan) is particular to the constructive uses of elementary magic . . . and Gork throws a pitchfork. Even the lovely Paxelle, who does not wish to enrage in battle, finds a place for her own personal philanthropy, maschism.

-R

I have to say that as a PS3 user I'm feeling forced to use magic. Why? Because without spells I don't know what to do with my controllers R2 button... seriously. I'm still trying to figure out how to build my Orc melee character. From a practical standpoint casting just doesn't make much sense. I never plan on having a very big Magicka pool, and the lower level spells aren't going to compare to high level potions or items enchanted with permanent effects... like say a helmet with Night Eye.

I can't decide on a Birthsign for this character...

- The Warrior seems a little useless even though I plan on efficiently raising (maxing) my endurance. The actual Health pool difference between a maxed Endurance starting at 55 and a maxed Endurance starting at 65 is next to nothing.

- Atronach looks very useful, but really too powerful for my taste. I don't want an unstoppable character and an Orc with maxed Endurance plus the Atronach Birthsign seems like overkill.

- The Lord??? What do you guys think about this one for an Orc melee character. I can put the clicky heal into my controller's R2 button, and it's not exactly a spell is it? It seems more like an innate regeneration. I like how it ignores the armor penalty, making it seem made for a melee character. It certainly heals for a lot on a low level character, but I'm guessing it will be next to useless on a level 30 character (I plan on maxing my level to 30.)

Could use some suggestions here please

It sounds like you are thinking that potions and special powers are ok,but not spellcasting - that sounds neat. If that is the case, it seems The Lord would be a great birthsign, and Cobra's Dance (from the Serpent Doom Stone) would be a fabulous once a day equalizer when needed. Then rely on potions.

To me, the elephant in the room with an orc is 25% magic resistance. Work with it by adding more items that boost it well above 25%.

Sir Rugrat,

I am most displeased with your apparently puerile and unfledged attitude to the darker arts. The assassin will not strike forth from the shadows when you are holding your flimsy torch like a talisman of the Nine. The assassin prides himself on cold calulation and reason, unfettered by the self-delusion that bridles itself in the gentry and noble class.
Patience, planning, discretion, and obtaining the battle-ground of his choosing is the forte of the dark cloaked assassin.
Perhaps we do restort to the machiavellian trick, a card designed to make you watch one hand while we strike from the other- but in the end it will always get the job done.

I do have more respect for Orcs than mages, dear sir, but it is only because it takes two cuts (rather than one) to kill an Orsimer.

-Aradroth, Dark Brotherhood member

Bravil.

Thanks... as always Mentor Acadian

I was thinking I'd end up over powering my Orc by adding to his magic resistance... no?

A Khajiit snickers to himself in amusemant. "Who really cares how a prize is won? As long as your goal is met that's all that matters. Now..." He looks at the others with a grin. "Who wants to go for drinks at the nearest tavern?"

GORK LIKE DRINKING AS MUCH AS HURLING PITCHFORKS!

*raises pitchfork in the air*

To ale and horses!