I will do this someday.

when watching Star wars and thinking "what level Destruction is Darth Vader? i mean his shocking touch wooped that argonian (trandoshan). woooahh this movie is a Lore Killer! i mean shouldn't the emporer should be ghost! not Papaltine. ah what the heck gamesas, WHAT THE HECK!!

You've been playing waaaaaay too much TES when:

- You ask statues for names of people to be assassinated...

- And they tell you.

- You're surprised that asking random stone formations for supernatural weaponry doesn't work.

- Crabs refuse to sell you anything.

- You postulate a connection between being Altmer and having kidney failure.

- You scream 'DEMORALIZE!!!' at muggers.

- Your idea of abseiling consists of throwing yourself off a mountain and shouting 'Slowfall!'

- Any book that has over 30 pages seems excessive.

when you see a ghost and think "ectoplasm" and you believe that you are a journeyman of h2h and you try to attack it

when you put on a necklace and think it will allow you to access your dreams

when you try to repair your clothes using a repair hammer

so they do sell you stuff if you don't play TES too much? I guess I should have bought stuff from crabs before that fateful day I played Morrowind.

When you jump and tell everyone your acrobatics skill just went up

or in this case when you sneek or run as well (it draws very unwanted attention) n_e

and if you want people to call you by your characters(main) name..."Thesious"

When you play the game in your head, you still have a Five minute Loading Time.
When you trick a teacher into believing you, you go back to your friends and tell them You advanced in speechcraft.
When you do anything notable, you text all your friends saying: You have advanced at (Insert event here). You should rest and Meditate on what you have learned.
You try to torture your cat for information on the Eye of the Kaijitt.

Im guilty of the last 3.

If you're debating making an energy drink called "Skooma." Seriously thinking about it, but not making it big, just amongst myself and a few friends. Recipe thus far (Monster (our water), sugar (moonsugar), drop of fruit juice (nightshade))

when you create a character on monday at 12:00 noon,and by wednesday at noon you have accumulated 120 hours of gameplay



do the math

. . . when somebody says drugs and you respond, "Oh yeah. Skooma can ruin your life!"
. . . when you walk into a cave and expect to find a big chest with expensive stuff in it.
. . . when you think that national guard forts are now filled with criminals.
. . . when you get in a fight and you say, "i should turn the difficulty down, he looks tough".

Friend "Hey man, wanna play football with us?"
Me "Nah, my athletics is only at 14 right now, I'm just gonna go play oblivion" *Walks away*
Friend "Uhm..."

When on the one day you get out and take a walk on the nature trails you remember to keep an eye out for trolls.

Working on PC repair, I've had this one a few times.

Me: What's wrong with your system?

Dood: I dunno, just don't work.

Me: Let's take an assessment.

Dood: huh.

Me: It looks like your Motherboard is shorted, there might be an unintentional connection caused by misplaced seating.

Dood: uh...

Me: I'm gonna have to take your PC apart to further evaluate it.

Dood: Dun brake it plz

Me: Eh, I'll just save before.

Dood: wat.

Me: Wat...

These are real life situations which have actually happened to me

I went to a fair and I looked around at the crowd and wondered where the argonians and khajiit were because I could only see humans.. then I was like oh.. wait XD

I was in a french exam and wrote a paragraph in french, I then read it, realised it was all wrong and looked around on my desk for the quick load button.

I picked up a bunch of flowers and got seriously confused because I didn't hear the little *snick* sound.

I walk down the street and look at cars number plates which have these letters on the end and immediately think of what the letters stand for:

TGM (toggle god mod cheat)

NPC (None playable character)

TM (toggle menus cheat)

TFC (toggle free camera cheat)

I have made a few films using oblivion so I have those cheats ingrained into my head.

My dad is a motor biker and goes on these biking holidays, one of them took him over the apls and I really hoped he wouldn't have to deal with any cliff racers.

I could finish the sentence in the OP in so many ways but I'll just post these ebcause they actually happened to me

when you speculate tes V

You know you've played too much TES

when you refuse to eat an apple because it damages your luck attribute

when you decide to invest in your local supermarket because you'll be able to sell higher priced items

when you wish that all of the actors in the Twilight movies were really vampires so you can pickpocket their vampire dust of them and sell each one for 250 gold to the members in your anti-vampire club.

When I can relate RL physical laws into TES, and slips into my lab reports and homework/tests/quizzes.

^ As a variant of that, when I'm studying various Philisophical positions and ideals on concepts of time, free will, epistemology, metaphysics, etc, and the first applicable examples I think of are from TES.

...When your first thought when buying throwing knives is, "This'll do a number on those cliff-racers."

...When you begin to want to port items from TES into RL and vice-versa.

When you never wear more than 2 rings at once

When you go to prison and push on all the bricks in the walls

When you contemplate turning up the brightness when you go into your basemant

....and the list goes on

You think that the Dark Brotherhood started WWI.
I wonder how Hitler would react to Argonians and Orcs and Elves.

Here is something.

Teacher: So who can tell me what the Highest point in the world is.
* A short blond kid named Billy raises hand
Teacher:Billy
Billy:Dive Rock
Teacher:No
Student:Mount Everest
Teacher:Good Job! Now who can tell me why the election of 2008 was so important?
*Billy raises hand
Teacher:Billy (sigh)
Billy: A Red Guard became the Emperor.
Teacher:*facepalm* NO!
_________________________________
*Following week

Teacher:Now who can tell me why drugs are so bad?
*Billy raises hand
Teacher:Billy (sigh)
Billy: Skooma can lower you health by 20
Teacher: Skooma?Really Billy?
________________________________________
Teacher: Now today we are going to run half-a mile. Can anybody tell me how this can be done without hesitation?
*Billy raises hand
Teacher:Billy (in agitated voice)
Billy: We make sure we have an athletics of 65.
Teacher:Billy we have gone over this a million times.
*In attempt to persuade the teacher Billy says a dirty joke about an Argonian*
Teacher:Billy that was the most off color joke I have ever heard!
*Billy walks away thinking *Yes my Speechcraft increased.

Now this is original .

Were you being sarcastic?
Well I kind of took what people were posting and put them in a humours scenario. So not the most orginality.

If he was being sarcastic, I'm not.

I applaud you on that. :clap:

I think it was original.

And if he was being sarcastic, you wouldv'e seen the sarcasm brackets around the phrase.
Which is a sign of being of the forums to much

[sarcasm]
Like how I'm never on these forums.
[/sarcasm]

These really happened to me.

When one of your female friends cannot open a pickle jar, You raise your fist in the air, casting a fortify strength spell on yourself. Then proceed to successfully open the jar.
When one of your friends (new to tes) often texts or calls you for help.
When you attempt to increase your sneak level by crouching and walking into a corner for hours.
When you drive by the local apothecary and almost stop wondering if you could find a levitation potion inside.
When you DM a game of D&D set in tamriel (I almost did that... but could not get enough interest)
When Outlander has became your username on everything..

That's all I can think of for now. I love these threads ^_^