if on that fateful day in the Imperial Sewers, Uriel Septim had chosen YOU as his rightful heir (forgoing all that MQ business ), what would your first laws be that you would implement? How would YOU ruin Cyrodiil?

personally i'd immediately begin construction on a massive monument to my Breton and build 3 or 4 more cities, all payed for by taxing khajiit and argonians out the ass! xD

lmao and i meant RULE cyrodiil** but i guess it goes either ways

Make the thieves guild legal and killing if you have a permit.

Umm... Morrowind would get absolutely everything that was even marginally valuable, if I were in charge. I really love the Dunmer. :'P
Considering how biased I'd be, I'm sure I'd get kicked off the throne in no time (completely ignoring Cyrodiil and all the other provinces CAN'T net anyone much public affection).

day 1: all sorts of sixual practices allowed 24 / 7;

day 2: the arena champion would be my Sumi "Animetricia", a 4 foot skinny woman (18) wielding the heaviest warhammer existent (in thongs and high heels only);

day 3: the dark brotherhood and the thieves guild substitute the Imperial guards and the blades, who would all be locked in the different 60 oblivion gates(or whatever the number);

day 4: necromancy allowed, supervised by arch-mage Mannimarco (necessary for day 5 'special′);

day 5: open competition for the most creative Adoring Fan Execution; a statue to the winner.

day 3.5: (forgot) Skooma the official blessing drink in all chapels and guilds.


What a most excellent thread...

I would create a social order based on the free grouping of individuals, an order that would guarantee to every human being free access to the earth and full enjoyment of the necessities of life according to individual desires, tastes, and inclinations; a system of government that would liberate the human mind from the dominion of religion and the human body from the dominion of property, with the ultimate goal of liberating Tamriel from the shackles and restraint of government itself.

Marx called that Comunism

Well the first thing Id do is...

Talk to Martin
LIKE A BOSS

Lead the Blades
LIKE A BOSS

Close some gates
LIKE A BOSS

Hide in Crates
LIKE A BOSS

Score some Skooma
LIKE A BOSS

Visit Bruma
LIKE A BOSS

... you know, the usual.
CAUSE IM THE BOSS!

Buffy would probably have the White Gold Tower moved into a giant tree in Valenwood. Then she'd have the legs fo the throne shortened so her feet could touch the ground when she sat in it. Oh, and have lots of Tamika's around. And strawberries and sweet rolls too. Hmm. . . well, on second thought, maybe it would just be better if she gave the Amulet to Baurus and let him run the empire. Things would probably work out better. :foodndrink:

My initial primary concern would be providing military protection for the people of the Imperial homeland. One of the Empire's greatest mistakes in its final days was spreading itself too thin, so thin, in fact, that it didn't even have the troops to protect its own homeland and so thin that it didn't put aside time to deal with the corruption and disunity of its home province. I would, using funds from the Imperial treasury, commission the talented smiths of Tamriel to study and produce more effective armor and weapons for the soldiers of the Empire. I would also proceed to allow more liberties to the various peoples of the Empire, issue a decree allowing additional representatives from the various provinces of the provinces' choosings to serve in the Elder Council as people of nearly equal voting rights as the Cyrodiilic members of the Council, and bring at least 25% percent of Imperial troops stationed outside of Cyrodiil to Cyrodiil for protection. I would turn the Empire into more of a Republic in the hopes of maintaining peace and restoring some semblance of unity among the provinces. I would then order an emergency meeting of the new Elder Council, including the new representatives, to discuss the situation and how the other provinces wish to deal with it, with myself as the leader of the Council.

Well, I would make the Dark Brotherhood legal, make them like the Morag Tong. I would make the guards stop pursuing the Grey Fox, because that is a waste of time. I would mobalize the imperial armies to stop the oblivion crisis, to heck with the political expediency Ocato was talking about. I would mass the armies and systematically close the gates. The Blades would learn how to use bows.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emma_Goldman called it Anarchism.

Lmao Zakarius that made my day
Anyway, I would tell Baurus to let me loot the emperor's robes
I would seize the "Gray Aegis"
I would declare that all spears, that supposedly Cyrodil has never acquired, be sent to Cyrodil immediately, along with all medium armor
I would order the silly arcane university to learn how to levitate and teleport
I would force Skyrim to remove their voodoo magic that prevents me from crossing the border
I would recall all shipments of apples, and replace them with poisoned apples (maybe not all of them)
I would exterminate every troll, ever

Kill Ocato. Then reanimate him and kill him again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again . . .

I don't like Ocato.

I would say go f***k yourself Mr Septim. I′m not a leader, nor a puppet. I follow my own path

Heddvild would put on her fur armor, say something rude to Ocato, and head off into the hills.

Martine would assemble an army, and invade the Shivering Isles.

Rawia would go home to Morrowind, and never be heard from again.

Fortja would name the unnamed roads, send the Blades to investigate where the bandits are getting all the fancy weapons and armor, and have Lake Rumare dredged so the boats could actually navigate all the way to the Waterfront Harbor.

Day one of my rule: Give the empire to Savlian Matius.
Problem solved

Turn the throne over to Glarthir, sit back and watch what happens. In case of likely worst case scenario, move to Morrowind.

WooHoo! Buffy votes for this!!! :wub:

I have always felt that when it comes to a noble selfless hero, he is the gritty real deal. I was delighted when I discovered my elf feels the same. In fact, she is rather smitten by Savlian, even refering to him as the man with the heart of a lion.

I'd probably get rid of half the counts/countesses.
Bye bye to: Regulus Terentius and his skooma addicted son, Andel Indarys and his weasel of a son, and finally to Marcius Caro and his racist wife.

Make the Thieves Guild responsible for the day to day business of law enforcement in the Empire.
Inhume all of the Blades with soultrap and Black Soul Gems.
Inhume Martin with soultrap and Black Soul Gem.
Install the Dark Brotherhood as the replacement for the Blades.
The former Guards are to be abused as construction slaves, to rebuild the ruined Forts.
Inhume Traven with soultrap and Black Soul Gem.
Make necromancy legal and install Mannimarco as the head of the Arcane University in the IC.
Inhume Martin with soultrap and Black Soul Gem.
Return the lands stolen over the years by the Empire to their rightful owners.


You missed one family that needs most urgent attention. The Umbranoxs of Anvil. A family that got their lands through murder by magic.

Jenifur Charne

Let's be realistic here. You're taking over from an Emperor who was assassinated. You'd spend your first year on the throne trying to get five minutes of privacy without a ten-man bodyguard following you around.

After that, all your time would be taken up signing documents that required royal assent, even though the content is trivial. You'd be asked to make decisions on weighty matters, and your judgement would then get ignored in the execution. The High Council would debate things that only matter to themselves, and keep asking your opinion, only to ignore it when given. Finally you'd find a way to sneak out through the sewers and leave the mess to someone else, maybe faking your own assassination on the way.

Uriel is alive and living under an assumed name somewhere near Anvil.

Makes perfect sense: you are a convict, who happened to be in a cell w/ a secret passage ,and would carry some stupid amulet just coz the geezer told u so... right.

all those initial battles were made with wooden swords between the personal guards and close friends of the emperor; the blood was fake, and these guys left a bunch of rats, a corpse and some goblins to make it feel authentic.

Find someone capable to run the whole thing while I rule as a puppet doing nothing but attend 24/7 orgies around the country.

:shocking: :blink: :chaos: :drool:

Camarilla for Empress NOW!